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'Getting Back Out There': Thoughts on Love Recovery

The idea of 'getting back out there' is a complicated one. For some, a 're-bound' situation marks a coping mechanism for dealing with the loss of somebody, and at times a way of detaching from that person, or the relationship, especially the emotions the topic might evoke. For others, meeting new people and engaging in casual relations is something that doesn't interest them, or maybe requires too much energy. What's more, the thought of being intimate with another person can be scary in some situations, and all these emotions are put under the microscope when we are expected to get back out there.

But getting out there doesn't have to mean finding a new partner. Heartbreak can induce a period of hibernation. Finding new hobbies and simply reintroducing yourself with the outside world can do wonders for the emotional recovery of a breakup. Reminding yourself that there is a world beyond heartbreak is a gradual but revolutionary step to anyone dealing with the aftermath of life after love.

Leaning into youth culture is a tried and tested way of doing this. The U.K. scene has a plethora of subcultures, all housing within them different communities, lifestyles, values and aesthetics. Going back to what we once knew before a relationship, or re-connecting with old hobbies, can re-affirm a pivotal sense of independence.

The emerging subsection of wholesome living is something of a rave amongst young adults. Social media and brand marketing are both pointing us in the direction of long walks and living room yoga sessions. For those looking to restore peace in their lives post-breakup, introducing more wholesome practises can anchor the younger heartbreak generation into the world of self-care.

It is important to lean into what you relate to. Exploring nightlife again can open up new possibilities to explore different club and music genres and embed yourself in a culture of expressionism. The U.K. has a variety of inclusive scenes that are brought to life during the weekend. Finding your own type of night out can help to find like-minded people.

Alternatively, certain behaviours or ‘toxic traits' can come knocking at the door after a breakup. Maintaining a level of control in your life is easier said than done, and the possibility of getting back out there can spark up old habits. Yet, to completely deprive yourself of social connection because of this fear would be a mistake. The value of assessing where you are at and staying honest with yourself about how much you can take on is pivotal to managing the steps of getting out there.

The process of getting back out there can, at times, give us the closure we need to get over past relationships. What this process looks like is down to the individual. It is not always the case that our closure will come from making new romantic bonds, sometimes it is about re-connecting with yourself and looking introspectively towards personal needs and desires; filling up our own cup before pouring into somebody else's. 'Getting back out there' can be a personal journey, one I would argue is certainly worth taking.


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